Warning!

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Every once in a while the cats inside the house are pestered by the strays who like to visit.

It is usually in the early hours when the activity begins.  First off, there is constant traffic between bay window and glass doors.  Back and forth.  Back and forth.  Fur rises along the back and the tail puffs up like blimp.  Let me at ’em.  Let me at ’em.  Then the yowling commences.  All take heed, there is an intruder around.

This can be very amusing.  Until you remember it is 3:00 o’clock in the flipping morning.

Curiosity 

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There seems to be this rule for all cats.  It is ‘to cause trouble when the mood takes’.  For the most part I have well-behaved pets.  It may have something to do with their age or the fact that they are all scaredy-cats.

Yet, every once in a while, curiosity gets the better of them and exploration of anything new or unusual is commenced. They sniff, they paw and they cautiously pull at items heretofore ignored.  Inevitably, something will go crashing before long.  This sends all of the felines scattering no matter where they are in the house.

It never fails, it is always the guilty party who returns to the scene of the crime.  Innocently looking at the human to see what all the fuss was about.

Explain That

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Anyone who owns a cat (or should I say, ‘who is owned by a feline’) becomes immune to the many scrapes and bruises that are an everyday occurrence.  Unless the cat is de-clawed (which is cruel) there will always be scars, scabs and bandage-covered wounds along arms, legs and other visible body parts.

As distressing as these marks can be, it is nothing in comparison to the more intimate places one finds themselves with lacerations.  At the time, it may be extremely cute and enjoyable when the feline nibbles at your ears or nips your neck.  But a lazy lounge across the chest can end terribly if loud noises suddenly burst forth.

Explaining these symbols of a panicking pet may be mortifying.  Cats being cats and with their aloof nature will abstain from any justification of their actions.

It is what, it is humans!  Deal with it.

Wet Cat

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It is a known fact that cats and water do not intermingle well.  Having a B. A. T. H. will bring out sharp claws in the best of them.  However, there are rebels who relish the fresh rain water cascading throughout their lovely locks.  They will, happily, hazard a journey into an horrendous deluge and go about their usual business.

Upon returning indoors, absolutely waterlogged, they will begin the adorable process of licking themselves dry.  Removing the moisture with sheer abandon, they care not who is in the line of fire.  Sit too close and a flick of a sodden paw may inflict annoying droplets of drizzle to the human’s body or worse their glasses.

The price to pay for being a cat owner.

The Wandering Cavalier

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In the summer the cats are allowed outside to wander unrestrained.  The reason for this is twofold.  First, the mother was feral and lived outdoors for the first year and a half of her life.  Because of that, the kittens have always ventured out with her.  Second, and more importantly, living in the country, they are far enough away from the seldom-used road, to allow them the freedom to explore.

As cats are ramblers, they rejoice in this luxury.  Their human, on the other hand, does not.  It is not such a joyful experience, especially when their instincts take over at dusk and they want to be set at liberty.

It is not them that has to roll out of bed four and five times a night in order to anxiously look for their return.  Nor are they the least bit perturbed upon rolling in at 3:00 a.m.  And the next day, while the human can barely keep eyes open, they spend it in blissful slumber.  

The cavalier attitude of a cat will put a human in their place every time.

Fool Me Once: Whose The Fool?

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Everyone knows as soon as a cat has been firmly ensconced in the household there is no longer any privacy.  Going to the toilet becomes a team sport.

As such, one late night trip to the loo (sans lights and glasses) resulted in an most unusual occurrence.  Not one cat.  While standing at the mirror to wash hands, I noticed a white blob in the hallway.  Aha!  Waiting outside the door for me.  Very polite.  Telling it how pretty it was and paying the Royal homage as required, I was a bit miffed to be snubbed.  Not one meow back.

Upon leaving the bathroom, there was good reason the cat did not respond.  I was talking to my running shoes.

Reentering the bedroom, I found all the cats on the bed.  Some of them smiling, mischievously, at me.

Cats Having Fun

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Patches is the one cat that can be counted on to become embroiled in all manner of shenanigans.  So, one overcast afternoon, watching her jump onto the back of the fireplace put me on guard.

Seconds later, she lifted her front paw into the air and began waving it back and forth.  Then she switched paws (apparently she is ambidexterous) and did the same with the other one.

Who was she waving at?  What was she doing?

Approaching the window for closer inspection, it all became clear.  As I said, it was a cloudy day and had rained earlier. Water was dripping off the eaves trough and Patches was, blissfully, whacking at the falling drops.

Pounce

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Pretty, was the cat that followed me along the road one day and began my adventure with felines.  As far as I knew she was an outside cat, as she stayed around the house for a couple of years.  Even during the harsh Canadian winters.

One winter’s day, she sat on the back of the fireplace sunning herself.  Then all of a sudden her ears pricked up and her attention was all agog.

Not knowing what the excitement was, seeing as the field was covered in snow, it was a bit of a surprise when she leapt to the ground and pounced into a snowdrift.

Seconds later she returned to the back of the fireplace, covered in white flakes, with a nice juicy mouse for lunch.

Where’s The Cat?

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This particular incident happened to my sister cat, as my felines do not do such crazy things.  Ha!

Dusty, my sister’s older Ginger Tom, in one of these strange creatures who demands water from the bathroom tap first thing in the morning.  It has become part of their morning ritual.  Get up, go to the bathroom, turn on the tap and let the cat lap away while the human takes care of their own business.

One a.m., upon entering the bathroom, Dusty was already awaiting his aqua.  There was a mound of rusty coloured fur lying in the sink.  Patiently waiting.

Guess he was really thirsty.

Chipmunk!

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Sitting outside with the cats usually results in them hanging around wherever I am.  I like this.  It makes me feel important.

One day while taking the sun with Tuffy, I looked down the field to see a chipmunk scurrying towards the forest further away.

At the same time Tuffy saw the moving rodent.  Ears and tail stood to attention.  Before I knew it, she took off after it.  Only reaching mid-field before realizing there was no way she would get a tasty lunch.

She trotted back secure in the knowledge there would be another chance, another day, another meal.