Mr. Tibbs’ Pick Of The Week

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Exploring

This is Part 2 of the sordid tale of misplaced loyalty. In Exploring, our intrepid adventurer, Basil the Brave, is hot on the trail of a certain flirty feline who has mesmerized his Mum. πŸ™€πŸ™€

*For various reasons, I refuse to show Part 1. The fact that my Singing Angel comes off looking like a push-over is among the grounds for which I remain distant on the matter. (Can’t believe Bas Mum would be so easily enamoured by a belly? . . . )*

Back to the film . . . Basil starts off his quest with a quiet dignity hoping to spot the intruder. He, unlike some, follows the rules and tackles all obstacles head on. No rolling over to impress the humans for our young hero!

I do believe this could be the start of a whole series. My hope is for a Part 3 where Basil captures and exacts a fair punishment for the Hussy with the flirty belly!

🐾🐾 Mr. Tibbs 🐾🐾

*Part 1 . . . If you have the stomach for it!

A Loop Hole

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I have looked up the origins of leap year for a friend of mine whom is being pestered by a nip fiend who continues to propose marriage to him because it is the year with the extra day.

As this determined kitty is a relative of mine, I thought I would take on the responsibility of sorting the two of them out. Being a romantic at heart, I also, want to help these two love birds find true happiness.

So, this is the information I have acquired which I’m sure will aid my sisfur and her love, Lord Graydon, to a blissful future . . .

It seems that long ago St. Brigit of Kildare complained to St. Patrick (yes . . . the same hero who rid Ireland of its blarney-spewing, snakes. At least, the ones slithering along the ground) about the menfolk taking their sweet time when asking an intended for her hand.

St. Paddy took on this challenge and decided that woman could, indeed, make the first move and pop the question but only on the leap DAY! February 29th. (Some, 😈, have got it into their heads that they can nag their prospective spouses every day of the year and get away with it.). It seems that is not so!

Another rule of leap year that may be of interest to the uninformed, is that if a proposal is refused, on the day, the Tom must pay a fine!

I have imparted this tidbit of vital data to a certain black and white She-😈 in hopes that she will leave my good friend to come up with his own ideas about what constitutes a romantic plighting of their troth.

Instead, there was a hive of activity and many meows of ‘only one month to go until Marshmallow Cheeks is mine for good! (Sorry, LG!)

Sometimes, February 29th is known as ‘Bachelor’s Day’ despite the fact that the fine for a refusal of marriage is set at ‘a gown, money or 12 pair of gloves’ (the gloves are to hide the ringless claws from the general public). But I think a convoy of trucks, to the house, filled with ‘NIP’ would be a better alternative as compensation.

Now, this next fact may be the one bit of information that most Toms will grasp a hold of when being pursued by an unrelenting feline. It may involve the temporary changing of citizenship but here goes . . .

It seems that in Greece and Italy it is considered bad luck for Toms or felines, in general, to propose during leap year. If one was to become a Greek or Italian citizen and convince a certain nip fiend that the products 🌿🌱🌿🌱🌿🌱 of the southern Mediterranean countries were the very best there is, they may be willing to conform and therefore be ineligible to propose marriage. (I hope this is helpful Signore LG?) Otherwise, the pleas for wedded bliss may continue throughout the year.

As much as I would like to get rid of an annoying sisfur and have a Lord among the relatives, I also know that I have sworn to tell the truth always. This loop hole may just prevent my pal from a lifetime of having his tail yanked.

🐾🐾 Mr. Tibbs 🐾🐾

Mr. Tibbs’ Pick Of The Week

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The Karate Kid ; The Ginga Ninja Returns

This is a wonderful remake of the classic tail of the student surpassing the teacher!

Maggie, the adorable Panfur, has worked hard to teach the younger and more nimble, Geoff, the Eastern Philosophy and fine art of the surprise attack. The Ginga Ninja takes to the lesson like a duck to water.

Forget ‘wax on, wax off’ our enthusiastic hero uses the cat tree to his advantage and lulls the master into a false sense of security. Temporarily hiding for protection, only to pounce when least expected. It’s a brilliant move!

If this doesn’t secure a Green Belt (not really sure about the degrees in this particular martial art) for the Assassin-In-Training, I don’t know what will?

I love a movie that has me cheering for the underdog . . . πŸ™€πŸ™€πŸ™€ . . . I mean, ‘undercat’. Watch and enjoy the cunning hero, do his stuff!

🐾🐾 Mr. Tibbs. 🐾🐾

*Maggie has found and trained the next Bruce Lee. Thanks, Mags. The world needs more role models like Geoff.*

Valentine’s Day Is Coming

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Two weeks into the New Year and I find myself ready to break my resolutions.

Yes, I know I only had a couple, but I have been remiss in my quest to knock my flirting on the head. Is it my fault there are so many beautiful felines in need of a compliment? I’m only a Tomcat, after all. I cannot be expected to ignore a damsel in distress. One’s gallant nature ought not to be suppressed.

I do believe my Queen of Hearts has mentioned this to me before but I never realized what a strain it can be to go against one’s instincts and quash the dauntless admiration I am compelled to bestow upon the deserving feline population.

So, my incessant flirting shall continue. WATCH OUT LADIES!

The other, and more important resolution, was to my make Cleopatra’s dreams come true. This one, I may pull off. I am about to go deep into planning a Valentine’s Day, the likes of which she will never forget. And as such, it make take up all of my spare time. πŸ™€πŸ™€

Yet, my greatest fear is that some latent Lothario will use my absence to dally with the love of my life, leaving me waiting at the altar for a beautiful BSH who has had her head turned by a smooth-talking Caesar and Tibbs-wanna-be!

Oh, they do exist! And if the truth be told, some of them are better looking than yours truly. So, this Valentine’s Day I shall sweep the Buxom Babe off her paws, just you wait and see what I have planned.

Speaking of surprises, I have some news to impart on the Louis B Hare front.

Only the other day while I was mining for diamonds (via the Internet), my Valentine’s Day shopping was interrupted by a police constable arriving at the door. Answering it had me shaking with trepidation.

I was handed something called a summons to appear in court in a month’s time. I cannot tell you how joyous this made me.

It seems that Mr. Hare wants to take me for a ride and clear up our tiny disagreement. I’m no legal-eagle but I’m pretty sure ‘breach of contract’ means I will finally be free of this pesky agent and not have anything to worry about, other than making my Cleopatra’s the happiest she has ever been!

No one is more thrilled than I, at this fortuitous turn of events. I never would have thought that Louis could be so reasonable. To be honest, I thought there was going to a long, drawn out court case.

But instead, a simple confession of guilt and the handing back of #MTIFF and everything will be tickedy-boo. I don’t even need to consult my lawyer’s office (or so the papers suggest).

I do believe I shall get this all sorted out before the Valentine’s Day and the gift of the century! She might want to marry me, on the spot! (That’s how good it is!)

Mr. Tibbs’ Pick Of The Week

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BABE- Watch, The Movie

This is my kind of chick flick. A beautiful Babe destroying an annoying birdie!

Shelby, the stunningly gorgeous, star of this motion picture, tosses and bats at the noisy feathered creature until it is well and truly dazed and confused.

And speaking of which, I’m sure her Uncle Clinton missed the subliminal message of her flipping the bird at him. I’m more than happy to point it out to him, though.

Personally, I can’t get enough of the prize winning Tortie, Selkirk Rex. Shelby’s smooth cat-like moves while toying with the prey is exciting to observe. There are no two-ways about it, her mega star status has been sealed. The camera loves her and so do her legion of fans. Of which I am one.

This show-winning feline has now conquered the silver screen. Good breeding is all in the genes, Babe! *Uncles not included.* Watch and see how impressive she is . . .

🐾🐾 Mr. Tibbs 🐾🐾

Seanie Boy

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This leap year was filled with such promise but it quickly turned sour when my, possible, husband and good pal, Seanie Boy passed away 😿 on 2 January 2020.

Seanie was the sweetest, modern day Tom I know. A white and grey (my favourite colours in a Tom) American domestic cat with a tender heart that he liked to show to the females. Elsa, his sisfur and the American She-😈, loved him so.

And despite the fact that when he was found in the window well, frightened and alone, the vet pronounced him FIV and suggested that he be put down. His family did no such thing and he lived and loved another 7 1/2 years.

As some of you may know, Seanie and I had a whirlwind (or maybe I should say, a ‘nip-hazed’ . . . ) romance that may or may not have resulted in our marriage? Neither of us could remember the details.

He was a true gent and did not mind my incessant pursuit of a certain Marshmallow Cheeked BSH with a title. He only wanted me to be happy. As evidenced by the his generous offer of a ‘nip pipeline’ from Ohio to Ontario, Canada.

I loved Seanie Boy in my own way . . .

I know he enjoyed my conquests almost as much as his own.

Being a fierce hunter was important to the both of us. Many’s the time, he brought home a half eaten mouse or a rabbit or two which he taught a lesson by leaving only the body or ear, for his Mom. Could there be a more thoughtful gift-giving kitty?

I shall miss my Seanie Boy (and his nip supply) but oh how, I would do anything to hear him meow his special name for me one more time. 😿😿

Gonna miss you, Seanie,

Your,

Sassenach

The New And Improved Tibbs

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Happy New Year Everyone!

This is the start of 2020! A year that will live in infamy.

As some of you may not know (although you would have to be living on the moon, not to be aware of this . . . ) but I am to be wed on the 5th of September 2020. A mere 248 days away.

In the past, I have been . . . shall I say, a bit ‘wobbly’ about the subject of marr . . . ma . . . m . . . The ‘M’ word! But not anymore. Just thinking about my bride-to-be has me chomping at the bit!

Oh, yes . . . This ‘bit’ of grey, BSH LOVE is the only feline for me!

What’s this, I hear you ask. Has Tibbs given up his wandering eye? The answer to that, is a resounding . . . ‘Whatever, the little kitty wants’ I shall comply with.

This is not an admission of being rodent-like, in any way . . . I, just, intend to start as I mean to go on and keep the love of my life, sweet. So, I have high hopes for the coming year. And now that I have given my agent, Louis B. Hare, the elbow . . . I feel as light as a feather and as if all the world is at my paws.

No one . . . and I mean NO ONE . . . is going to keep me from wafting, merrily down the aisle (nor escorting my bride back up the aisle as the inimitable Mrs. Tibbs).

This year I have decided to make one resolution. Mind you, not any old resolution either. I do not smoke so quitting that nasty habit is out. And as I am as fit as a fiddle (albeit a bass fiddle) that is definitely off the list.

Now, as for ‘getting out of debt and saving money’ . . . I’m about to be married! I cannot even attempt to rein in that beast.

My resolution for 2020 is . . . To do everything within my power to make my Cleopatra, the happiest kitty EVER!!!

Short and sweet! Plain and simple! Her every wish is my command.

If she says ‘jump’, I’ll return . . . ‘I would, if I could.’

If she asks me to take out the trash . . . I shall have my sisfur, She-😈, removed from the premises.

If she wants me to dress up in a tie to impress her friends . . .

2020 is the Year Of The Rat and I intend to live up to that characteristic! Cheese for all! πŸ§€πŸ§€πŸ§€πŸ§€πŸ§€

Mr. Tibbs’ Pick Of The Week

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The Christmas Spirit

Every once in a while a film come along and shoots its lead cator to superstardom! This holiday blockbuster is just such a movie.

There is a new comedic genius amongst us and his name is Alvin! Watching this Christmas-themed cinematic delight has reminded me of why I have the best job in the world. No review will ever do this video justice. It is a ‘must see’!

It starts out with Skylar toying with a huge mouse but takes a radical turn when our leading Tom takes over. From his look of disbelief to the final scene, our boy does his best to raise everyone’s spirits.

Not going to spoil it for you, but Alvin is now a bona fide star of slapstick comedy! He could be the Three Stooges all in one!

Watch and see if you don’t agree . . .

🐾🐾 Mr. Tibbs 🐾🐾

*Do not try these stunts at home, kitties. It is strictly for professionals like Alvin.*

A Tibbs Christmas Carol

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1

“Bah Humbug!”

It’s the Christmas season and for the last few weeks, Louis, my hare-brained agent, has had me working my claws to the bone writing 100 reviews before the big day. He insists that if I do not complete this task, he will cancel Christmas and I shall NOT be whisked off to Hollywood to become a rich and famous film critic.

*Photo of Tibbs and the rabbit*

Needless to say, this has thrown me into a tizzy. “You can’t cancel Christmas!” I informed the orange-treat πŸ₯• munching, Tomcat, 48 hours before the big day.

“I can, Fat Boy! I gave you a choice . . . You opted not to do as I asked, now you and everyone else must suffer the consequences.”

I had failed to live up to the contract. Bah Humbug! All of a sudden, Christmas had become the worse time of the year. I let my fans down, I let myself down but worst of all . . . I had let my Cleo down. Maybe, I had to reconsider this whole wedding thing!

*Photo of Tibbs and Basil meeting on the street*

Walking home in the cold and snow left me weary and chilled. I ran into my pal Basil. He saw my grumpy demeanour and asked, “What’s the matter, Tibby?”

“I’m thinking about cancelling the wedding.” I told him.

“Oh, Buddy, you can’t do that. You love Cleo far too much.” Basil is the kindest soul on this earth.

“I don’t want to, but I might have to.” I uttered dejectedly.

“You’ll find a way out of your dilemma, I know you will. I have some last minute Christmas shopping to do. I’ve saved the best for last . . . got to get a special gift for my girl. Any suggestions?”

“A slap-up meal, is always a good choice.” My belly rumbled at the thoughts.

“A brilliant idea! Meowy Christmas, Tibbs!” He patted me on the back and off he went.

I did not have the heart to tell him Christmas was going to be cancelled as well. And all because of me. So, I continued on my way and the amount of good cheer sent in my direction began to annoy me. If another cat on the streets, meowed ‘Meowy Christmas’ at me, I intended to swat at them, and snap a resounding, ‘Bah Humbug!’

2

*Photo of Tibbs working by candlelight*

Christmas Eve found me up late, slaving away at another review. What else did I have to do? Louis wanted his 100 reviews and I had to keep going. Then without warning the power went out! Being the brave kitty that I am, I huddled by the candlelight hoping for some warmth and courage and enough light to continue writing.

Whenever things go awry my first instinct is to run but I still had 93 reviews to crank out. I could not let the eerie atmosphere deter me from my job. My scribbling was interrupted when, to my surprise, I heard the distinct sound of a collar bell.

This was strange as no cat, in the house, wore a collar. I leapt up and peeked my head around the doorframe! No one was there. My fur began to stand on end and my tail puffed up to three times its size.

I went back to writing but closed my eyes for only a second. Suddenly, I was awakened and standing before me was my pal, Zack!

*Photo of Tibbs meeting the ghost of Zack by the fireplace.*

“Tibbs . . .” He meowed my name without moving his mouth! “What is this nonsense about you cancelling your wedding?!!” Zack hissed, nearly making me run from the room.

“How do you know about that? I, only, thought about it earlier this today.” I was confused. “Zack, didn’t you go OTRB 🌈? How can you be here, now?” This was freaking me out!

“Meow . . .” Zack dug his claws into the carpet and stretched his body out fully. “I’m here to help you, Tibbs! We were pals here on earth and there are some more of your furriends who are willing to guide you towards the future you deserve.”

“My future?!!! The one without Cleo? Louis is going to ruin me, if I don’t get these reviews done! That’s the bleak future I’m facing, Zack.”

Growling, Zack arched his back and came to a standing position. “Louis does not have the power to ruin you!” He yowled.

“What?!!!”

“He lies!” Zack boomed.

I crouched down, ready to bolt.

Zack turned to leave the room. He meowed over his shoulder, “Expect three furriends to visit you. They will show you the way.” Zack leapt out the window.

I ran to the window, hoping to see him on the pavement below but spied no one. This was most disconcerting. It was like he just disappeared. I ran to my bed.

3

I awoke, with a start, to the sound of something jumping on and off the furniture in the other room. This peaked my curiosity. I raced . . . (Okay, waddled . . .) into the other room to see a sight that had my ears twitching uncontrollably. There in plain sight was my old pal, Scarlett, leaping from chair to chair batting around an object that I could not make out.

I knew Scarlett had gone OTRB 🌈 earlier in the year, so what was she doing here? I rubbed my eyes a few times to make sure it was really her. Then I realized what the object was that she was bunny kicking. A flyswatter! This was Scarlett, alright.

*Photo of Scarlett with the fly swatter and Tibbs watching.*

“Scarlett . . . Babe . . . Is that you?” I asked with trepidation.

She stopped what she was doing, sat up and said, “There you are, Big Boy! What’s this I hear . . . You’re considering working so hard that you’ll end up having Christmas without Cleo? And you want to cancel ‘The Wedding Of The Century’?”

When put like that, it sounded ridiculous. I hung my head in shame. “Christmas is just another day. And the wedding may not be the best thing for Cleo. Louis says . . . ” I stopped justifying my position when Scarlett held up her paw.

She approached me and said, “You’re very easily influenced, Tibbs.”

“No, I’m not!” I insisted.

Scarlett placed her paw in mine and we were transported to a time in the past . . . I could see myself at the beach with the Dude, Sundance. “Brah, you got to get a job. You gonna be married soon. You gonna have a wife to support.”

“That’s why I want to go to Hollywood, Dude.” I remember telling him.

“Marriage is a prison, Dude. I should know. You come see me when you in Cali., Brah. We have some fun together.”

*Photo of Scarlett and Tibbs watching Sundance on his surf board.*

Scarlett raised an eyebrow at me.

“The Dude knows what he’s talking about. Prison is his home away from home. But when he’s out, the Dude can pawty like nobody’s business. He can show me things . . . ” I defended.

“But can he show you how to keep Cleo and yourself, happy?” Scarlett raised a valid point. She took a hold of my paw once again and we zoomed to the scene last Christmas when we had a nip pawty to end all nip pawties.

There we all were lolling about the house spreading the catnip, far and wide. Patches, the resident nip fiend, teaching us all the best rolling methods known to felines.

“Do you think we should have invited LG?” I asked the She-πŸ‘Ώ.

“Lord who . . . ?” Patches could not even remember the name of the love of her life whilst luxuriating in the powerful weed.

*Photo of a nipped out Patches while Scarlett and Tibbs watch in the background.*

I had forgotten this. I turned gob-smacked eyes on Scarlett. She grabbed my paw and whisked us back home.

“What does all this mean?” I asked.

“As the Ghost of Christmas Past, I wanted you to see how your decisions today affect your tomorrows. Think about that when you want to cancel the wedding.” Scarlett picked up the fly swatter and ran from the room.

4

Thinking about all I had seen had me more confused than ever. I decided to go to bed. I barely got my head down when I heard the ding-dong of the clock striking two – BONG . . . BONG . . .

All of a sudden, I heard the distinct meowing of a Maine Coon. I arose and sauntered into the next room, only to be confronted by my recently passed pal, Frederick.

“Freddy . . .” I rushed towards him. He threw up his paws and stopped me in my tracks.

“Tibbs, Buddy . . . Tell me it isn’t true . . .”

“What, Frederick?”

“As the Ghost of Christmas Present, I’ve heard rumours about you dumping Miss Cleo? When I was among the living, I always looked up to you. It seemed to me, you had all the felines but your heart belonged to Miss Cleo.” Frederick began.

“It’s all true, Bud.” I answered but curiosity got the better of me and I asked, “The Ghost of Christmas Presents must be an important job. What kind of presents have you brought me? Are they filled with the ‘Spirit of Catnip’? I might have to hide them from Patches. You know what she’s like.” I sniffed around my pal for the distinct odour of the weed.

Freddy guffawed until his eyes leaked tears of joy. “I do miss your ‘Buffoonery’, Tibbs. But I’m here to teach you to live in the ‘now’.” Freddy held out his paw. I took it and we were whisked to a scene . . .

*Photo of Fred and Tibbs watching Basil and Moet on their date.*

Sitting in a fancy restaurant were Basil the Kindhearted with his girl, Tiny Bubbles. The lovely white Persian, Bubbles (aka Moet the Blind Cat) is given a covered plate, the aroma of which is scrumptious. She attempts to get at the food but cannot figure out how. “This meal smells delish, my Love. But I can’t . . .” She mentioned to her date.

Basil leaps to his paws. “Allow me, Momo . . .” He removes the cover, allowing Tiny Bubbles to drive into the meal.

“Cat bless you, Basil. You are the best Tomfurriend, a girl can have.”

Basil blushes and puffs out his fluff.

Freddy turned to me and boomed, “Their love brings them closer every day.”

Thinking of my Cleo, I said, “There’s plenty of time for Cleopatra and I to do romantic stuff like that.”

“I thought so too. Remember . . . Another scene unfolds before us . . .

Freddy and I were at a Stud Muffin Inc. meeting, a few weeks before he passed away. He asked me, “Should I ask Sooty to marry me?”

“You’re still a young Tom. Play the field a bit, son.” I answered flippantly.

*Photo of Tibbs wiping a tear from his eye.*

Re-living this scene nearly broke my heart. “Oh . . . Frederick . . .”

“I never got the chance with Sooty. Don’t make that same mistake, Tibbs.” Frederick’s wise words penetrated my heart.

He grabbed my paw and we transported back to my room.

“Will Cleo miss a lifetime of turkey and me, because of my behaviour?” I needed to know.

He meowed, “If you don’t change your ways and concentrate more on her. I foresee a lonely, thin grey BSH . . . turkey-less and without her McDreamy.”

I gasped at this harsh reality.

“The next Cat Spirit to visit you is the Ghost of Christmas Yet-To-Come. He will show you what your life will be, if you carry on the way you are.” Then with a hiss and a poof . . . Frederick disappeared.

5

Before I could even have a midnight snack, I was transported to a church where I stood at the altar awaiting my lovely bride-to-be Cleo. The nervous tension permeated my very being. I was ready to bolt.

Looking to the Vicar for support, I could not believe my eyes. It was Spooky. He winked at me and meowed, “Don’t do it, Tibbsy.”

*Photo of Tibbs at the altar with Spooky as the Vicar.*

I ran from the church, followed closely by Spooky.

“Stop running, you moron!” Spooky’s meows rendered me motionless.

“Spooky, why are you here?”

“I’m the Spirit of Christmas-Yet-To-Come and I have to show you how your ridiculous behaviour influences the other cats. If you go through with this great escape, your furriends will take a leaf out of your book and . . .” Spooky teleported me to a scene involving Bubbles (Moet), Minnie, Patches and my Cleo. All of them sitting around a dinner table sobbing and meowing.

“Why are they all crying?” I asked Spooky.

“They have no food and their Toms are conspicuously absent.” Spooky spoke solemnly.

“Surely, Bas, LG and the Dude are out rustling them up some grub?” I was distressed to see these lovely felines in such dire straits.

“The Toms decided to follow in your pawsteps and have absconded.” Spooky flicked his tail and we magically ended up in Sundance’s Catnip Mansion, where Basil, LG and the huge shadow of another cat rolled around enjoying wonderful weed cigars.

*Photo of Sundance, Basil, LG and a hulking shadow, at a Playboy Mansion type place, smoking nip cigars.*

I turned to Spooky and said, “Tell me, that isn’t Basil acting so disrespectfully. He loves Bubbles, he wouldn’t hurt her like that. And LG would never allow himself to be nipped to the gills for fear of what Patches might do to him. Even Sundance loves Minnie enough not to . . . Who is that other hulking mass? It isn’t me . . . Is it?”

“They all want to be like you. Carefree and irresponsible.”

I was crestfallen as we catapulted back to my room. Could I truly be such a bad influence on my pals? I shamefully asked Spooky, “Are these the things will come to pass or only what MAY come to pass?” It was an important question. I waited with bated breath for the answer.

Spooky meowed, “Change your ways and you can still rectify things.” And before I could thank my pal, he was gone.

6

I awoke to the sounds of kitty’s opening their Christmas presents. Admittedly, the racket that could be heard usually had me running for cover but not today. All that I had been shown in the night was that being afraid and running away was not the answer. I had to change my ways and face up to the truth.

I loved Cleopatra and she loved me. I loved all my furriends and I knew they returned the sentiment. From now on, I was going to show them all that Tibbs was no longer a push-over.

First off, I called Louis B Hare and left a message on his machine. “You’re fired!” Then I went to buy the biggest turkey πŸ¦ƒ I could find and invited all my pals round for Christmas dinner.

*Photo of Tibbs, Cleo, LG, Patches, Basil, MoΓ«t, Sundance and Minnie sitting around a table with Christmas dinner on it.*

It was the most joyous Christmas I have every encountered. Tiny Bubbles said it best when she meowed grace before the meal, “Cat Bless Us Everyone!”

The End.

*A special thank you to Basil and his Mum for help with the photos*